Dr. Gerardo Ventura Serrano, member of the Spanish Society of Gynecology and Obstetrics, and Núria Jorba, sexual coach, clinical sexologist and couples therapist, help us to solve eight common questions about sex.
1. Does the size of the vagina matter?
When we are not stimulated, the size of our vagina ranges between 6 and 8 centimeters. And it can go up to 12 when we get excited. If during your intercourse you feel pain, it is not that your vagina is small, but that you have not been excited enough and, therefore, it has not been properly widened.
It is true that over the years, as with any other tissue in the body, the vagina loses elasticity. In addition, sometimes childbirth can cause such a large dilation of the vagina that it muddies sexual intercourse because it is too large. In these cases, vaginal surgery can be used, which, in general, serves to rejuvenate the vagina, reduce the size of the labia, and thus increase sexual pleasure. "These interventions can help a person feel better about their body", says Núria Jorba, "although the sexual organ that we must stimulate to enjoy sexuality is our head".
2. Why not lubricate?
The use of birth control pills, hormonal changes when reaching menopause, stress or lack of excitement could be the keys to explain the lack of lubrication. Analyze what can cause this disorder and think about how to overcome it. Also, lubricants can help you.
Of course, when choosing a lubricant, you must bear in mind that not just any will do. Choose one that is water-based and, if possible, has no flavors. Think that to get the strawberry flavor, for example, they have put ingredients that increase the chances of suffering from allergic reactions or promoting infections.
3. Is there any way to get pregnant earlier?
Dr. Gerardo Serrano assures that "any position is good to get pregnant." In this case, the most important thing is that you avoid stress, be clear about your days of maximum fertility and, from there, get down to work with your partner. The rest are myths without scientific basis.
According to some experts, staying still after sexual intercourse could facilitate pregnancy, since this would favor the arrival of sperm to the eggs, but there is no scientific evidence to prove this either. Anyway, as it is not something that can harm you, if you want to try it, there is no problem for you to do it.
4. Swelling in the clitoris, what do I do?
Some women notice how their clitoris swells after intense sexual intercourse or masturbation. This sensation can last until the next day and is due to the accumulation of blood that occurs in the area. In principle, you should not worry.
5. Why don't I feel like sex?
It is the most frequent sexual problem among women and experts say that stress, certain types of medications or lack of communication with the partner may be behind it. On the other hand, according to a study in the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism, our desire is not just a question of hormones. Regardless of the testosterone levels that we have in the blood, being good with ourselves increases our security and makes us enjoy sex more.
It is important not to overlook the lack of libido, face the problem and find a satisfactory solution. In this sense, we must bear in mind that the " pink pill " is not a panacea, as we may think at first. As we have noted, much of the lack of sexual desire has to do with psychological issues, such as relationship problems, stress, controlling and perfectionist personality, sexual monotony, etc. Therefore, most of the time it is better to do psychological therapy than to take medication.
6. Do women ejaculate?
Yes, we also ejaculate. At the moment of orgasm, some women expel a propulsive liquid from the urethra that accompanies a great wave of pleasure. However, other women suppress it for mistaking it for wanting to urinate. But it is not urine, but a liquid similar to that expelled by man but without semen.
7. Is reverse gear safe?
The reverse is not secure because neither prevents pregnancy and protects against sexually transmitted diseases. Before ejaculation, he secretes what is known as precum. It favors lubrication and makes the semen come out in suitable conditions to be fertile, but in that liquid there may already be sperm.
Similarly, douching is not a contraceptive method, nor does it prevent sexually transmitted diseases. The only thing you can achieve with this remedy is to unbalance your vaginal flora and have more options of contracting an infection. And, of course, get pregnant if you don't use protection.
8. Why use Chinese balls?
Contrary to what many people believe, these balls do not directly provide sexual pleasure when used. However, they affect the quality of our intimate relationships, since their continued use improves the tone of the pelvic muscles and the lubrication of the vagina.
